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There is no more independence in politics than there is in jail.
Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.
I don’t make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
A fool and his money are soon elected.
The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself.
There’s only one thing that can kill the movies, and that’s education.
The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, ‘How is the president?’
If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn’t have to advertise them.
If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don’t get wet you can keep.
Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn’t have to advertise it.