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It’s better to have loved and lost than to have to do forty pounds of laundry a week.
Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell, and advertise.
Work is accomplished by those employees who have not yet reached their level of incompetence.
Men now monopolize the upper levels… depriving women of their rightful share of opportunities for incompetence.
Competence, like truth, beauty, and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder.
Heredity is what sets the parents of a teenager wondering about each other.
Fortune knocks but once, but misfortune has much more patience.
Every girl should use what Mother Nature gave her before Father Time takes it away.
The best intelligence test is what we do with our leisure.
An intelligence test sometimes shows a man how smart he would have been not to have taken it.