Quotes by Larry David

There are times when I’m driving home after a day’s shooting, thinking to myself, That scene would’ve been so much better if I had written it out.

Well, after the divorce, I went home and turned all the lights on!

I was planning on my future as a homeless person. I had a really good spot picked out.

I gave a funny speech at my wife’s birthday party, and I’m thinking, ‘Hey, I’ve still got it.’

You have to discover when you’re inadequate to be funny and you don’t know you’re inadequate when you’re a kid.

There’s also a certain rhythm to the way Jews talk that might be funny.

I think we’re all good and bad, but good’s not funny. Bad is funny. Suppress the good and let the bad out, and then you can be funny.

Once I know people know who I am, it gives me a lot of licence and freedom to behave in ways I wouldn’t normally.

When you’re not concerned with succeeding, you can work with complete freedom.

The lunch in a normal American restaurant is very problematic for me. I don’t like to have hot food for lunch.